Winter in the home.

We all know what winter is, it is very cold and icy and you may need to wear several layers of warm clothing's and thermal under wears. Luckily I live in the tropics where it is summer all the year round.

If you are just married, then it is bright summer.Winter comes when you both morphed ,one into a fridge and the other the air-con. Both blowing strong and cold winds at each other.Could be a perfect storm in the making or a blinding blizzard or an avalanche.

Conflicts in marriages are bound to happen as you do not see eye to eye with your spouse.He has his perspective and it is different from yours,and when both don't give way,something got to break.

Your love for each other went out through the windows or through the chimney, burnt and smokey. Love died and you begin to see each others imperfections.

You love each other and want the other to be happy but the devil seems to block your good intentions and what comes out is devil woman at war with Frankenstein man. You cannot talk his language and neither does he understands your language.

It becomes like a cat and a dog fight.No one want to give way.Going for broke.You scratch him viciously and he barks and may bite you back .Perhaps his bark is worse than his bite.

If it is a long winter, one or both of you will go hibernate like the bears for six months..Do not worry, winter will soon be over.. Just wait for the summer to come again ,it will..

One of you will change your attitudes and warms the icy snows that has formed a thick wall between you two.

Both of you will be tired and had enough of each other.There is a time for everything. A time to sow and a time to reap.The suffering takes it's toll and the fire is doused.

The cycle of love and hate will turn again when you reach the bottom , the nadir of despair or the mother of all despairs in your relationship. You will realize your follies and mistakes and try to make up or agree with your other partners viewpoints. Then you will have more positive thoughts than negative thoughts and you will learn your spouse’s love language and rub his back and warm his heart.

Winter will soon be over when the sun comes up again..

If you have winter now in your home, don't despair , just ride out the storm , don't leave but burrow deeper into your home ..Chinese (Cantonese) say "Teng ngan siong or chang lok hei!"

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Free wonderful gifts that will win any woman's heart.

You do not have to spend an exorbitant amount to buy these gifts to win your WAG's heart.They cost you nothing and the results is fantastic beyond belief. Try it and you will find that your relationship will zoom off to the moon or the stars.

THE GIFT OF LISTENING.

Anybody can listen but knowing what she wants or what she mean's is another different thing. You can always ask her or probe her if you do not understand.She will not mind .You not only have to listen attentively but must also be seen to understand her feelings.

When she talks to you , look her in the eyes and not on her heaving chest.You may get motion sickness and nothing she said will be understood by your brain.

You cannot be seen reading the papers or watching T.V while listening.You got to be all ears without any distractions .

Many men don't really pay much attention or really listen when their wife speaks.They cannot give 100% to her.They need to force upon themselves to really listen like when they listen to the children speak.Wife too need that kind of attentions.

Sometimes , you cannot blame the men because some women ramble on too much and there are mountains of verbose and after sometime, you tend to just pretend to hear while your mind is thinking of other things or somewhere else.

THE GIFT OF AFFECTION

When you have it , you tend not to pay much attention to it. You take them for granted. It is only when someone is gone , you realized that you should have been much more affectionate or appreciate that person better.

You think life is forever but no one knows when we will die or how long we live. Everyday give hugs ,kisses and touch them because if suddenly they are gone, you wont be able to give anymore.

THE GIFT OF LAUGHTER

Life is very stressful for many, try to laugh and joke and this helps to reduce stress and make them more happy.Laughter is good medicine. Have friends or visit friends together and this would make life more interesting.

Your spouse and your friends are different .It is just like a multi vitamin.Your friends complement your diets. Too much of one kind is not good for your health.

THE GIFT OF A WRITTEN NOTE

Written notes are precious for they are everlasting and they can be read and reread .You should write those love notes more often and place them secretly in those places where she frequents.

A love letter would be great but many men don't write love letters after they are married .This is old fashion but in your own natural handwriting , it has a sentimental value.

THE GIFT OF A COMPLIMENT

Flattery opens many doors.Women loved to be flattered more than men. Do you feel good when someone compliments you? That's why you need to give more compliments than criticisms or complaints. Giving positive compliments makes the world a better living place.

THE GIFT OF A FAVOR

In the home, if you see something is not right or a job not done , you should handle it and don't complain even if it is her duty .

Offer to wash the dishes or mop the floor if you don't have maids. Don't be like a chauvanistic man and think this is below your manhood to mop floors or washed dishes or clothes.

Help to lightened her daily loads.You will show that you love her.Don't take her for granted. Learn to cook too for sometimes she may not be in the mood or unwell or need a rest .

THE GIFT OF SOLITUDE

When she wants to do her womanly things .Allow her the freedom and encourage her to have friends. Friends can make her feel better. Some man don't like their wife to mixed around because they will learn new things which can affect the family. Or they are afraid their wife will be up to no good or get conned by cassanova's .Many man then frowned upon their wife's activities outside the home.

THE GIFT OF A CHEERFUL DISPOSITION

A cheerful face is a happy face.Don't be affected by life's problems. There will always be problems in life.Life without problems is not challenging..Look at life's problems with a cheerful dispositions. Most problems are just molehills and not mountains as you perceived them.

Give all your worries and problems to Jesus if you cannot carry the burdens or if they are too heavy for you.

You may not afford to give her diamonds but these gifts are more precious than diamonds.They will ensure that your love will follow you to the end of the world with you ,even if you subsist on just plain bread and water.

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What makes a girl tick ?

When you have found the girl of your dreams and suddenly you become dumbstruck , tongue tight and lost at sea. What are you going to do or say to her ? You are fearful of losing her and worry and fret a lot .

She is so different from you and you want to present yourself in the best light to her and treat her with velvet gloves.There are certain keys which can open her door to you if you use the right words and right actions.


Praises, compliments and flattery will open many doors. Being told one is pretty or beautiful always work. You will put her in the proper frame of mind and she will see things positively about you.

Take good notice of any changes in her hairstyle or any new things about her. It shows that you are paying particular attentions to her.
Give her positive comments over it. She wants to be noticed and validate her feelings.

Look for a common interest as you get to know more about her. Share your feelings and talk to her but not too many of your secrets as she will find it no more interesting about you.

Be nice to her and act in a confident manner.Be supportive of her in whatever she does.The worst thing is finding someone who does not swim with you but against you. They do get personal most of the time.They are not like men who can compartmentalize and separate the real issues.

Make her feel that she is more important than your other friends and she will always come first.She will notice that even if she did not tell you.

If you want her attentions , you should stay away from other girls or try not to be too cozy with others as there could be other preying eyes who may tell on her.Pay particular attentions to those girls she dislikes or hates. That is like entering a mine field.

At some stage of your relationship, she may get mad at you but you should hold your fire and not get mad back. You will make it worse if you fight fire with fire.

You not only will not solve the problem but will create more problems and lead to a break up as in most cases or a freeze in your relationship.

If you are mad, don't take it out on her. You will make her cry and may hurt her and end of your dream.

Someone has to give way and unfortunately it will be you . You should take the brunt and absorb it like a good sponge. Never argue with her, treat it like another perspective .

You know the truth and just let it go. It is not important and not worth to win on issues and make an enemy of her.She will later find out the truth and come around.

If you know she likes you and you love her, then tell her but not otherwise as you will scare her away if she is not ready for it.

Be careful of how you treat others in her presence. You will be judged and she will see your true self through the way you treat others. Today others and tomorrow it will be her.

Good luck and with that , you should have the master key to open her many doors to her heart.

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